How to Get Out of a Slump While Being Kind to Yourself

We've all been there. You wake up one morning, and everything feels heavier than usual. Tasks that once seemed manageable now feel like Mount Everest, and motivation has taken a long vacation without letting you know when it’ll be back. As the days drone on, it becomes a slippery slope of “should-ing” all over yourself. I should be grateful for everything I have. I should stop doomscrolling. I should probably fold the laundry that’s been sitting on my bed for over three weeks. 

If any of this sounds familiar–hello, you have just arrived at slump central. Welcome! But here's the good news: slumps are not forever, and with the right approach, we can find our way out. This guide will provide you with actionable tips and encouragement to help you get back on track without the pressure of hyperproductivity.

Slumps Are Normal

Let’s acknowledge that slumps are a natural part of life. Everyone experiences periods of low mood and motivation. While they can be triggered by very specific instances like a huge life transition, it is also completely valid to be in a slump you can’t explain. (In all honesty, I’m in one right now as I write this. So this article is just as much my trying to convince myself that I can pull myself out of this as it is encouragement for anyone else who might be reading this.) 

Tips to Get Out of a Slump

Accept It

My therapist recently asked me how I would respond if a challenging emotion knocked on my front door. I promptly told her that–in proper millennial fashion–I would pretend I wasn’t home until they left. Unfortunately for me, challenging emotions aren’t door-to-door salesmen who will take the loss if you don’t answer their persistent knocking. They bang on the windows, start yelling, and do whatever is in their power to get your attention. I’ve never been the best hostess for emotions like anger or anxiety, but I am learning that if I just let them in from the get-go, they’re typically more manageable and don’t stay as long as if I ignored them. 

Reclaim Your Routine

I am a routine girly. Any disruption to my habits and I feel like the room is closing in around me. Naturally, when I’m in a slump, my routine is the first thing to go, which exacerbates the not-so-great state I find myself in. Being a planner person, I used to think that I could goal-set or Passion Plan my way out of my funk. To no one’s surprise at all, goal planning anxiety paralyzed me from doing much of anything–because even the mental load of setting a goal can be exhausting. So, we need to go back to basics. Consider resetting your routine to the absolute bare minimum, and slowly add in one new habit as you gain confidence. As for me, I’m starting with being in bed before 11 PM. We’ll see where I can go from there. 

Create a System of Gentle Accountability

Accountability doesn't have to be harsh or demanding. If it were, I’d probably never partake. Soft discipline and gentle accountability encourage you to stay on track without adding pressure. I’m not a tough-love kind of gal, so this approach is right up my alley. I’m a big fan of text message threads with my girlfriends to hold me to my word, but you can also use an intentional to-do list as a way to check in with yourself. 

Feelings Aren't Facts–They're Clues

Feelings are real, but they are not facts. In a slump, it might feel like I’m worthless and that I don’t have anything meaningful to contribute to society. But just because we feel it, doesn’t mean it’s true. Fortunately, I’ve been blessed with many friends who are therapists and counselors who have come to the same consensus: our feelings are giving us insight into a deep, unsatisfied need that is starving to be fed. Instead of seeing them as the enemy (see my knocking metaphor earlier in the article), I can view them as a compass that’s guiding me to my deepest needs.

Set the Most Achievable Goal Possible

If you must set a goal or some external achievement benchmark to pull yourself out of a slump, I highly recommend making the goal as easy to achieve as humanly possible. And don’t make the same mistake I’ve made where I lied to myself about my goal! Case and point: I set a goal of putting on my workout shoes every morning, with no need to exercise–just to build the habit. Then as soon as I put my shoes on, I’d tell myself, “Okay, now go workout.” No. Do not be like the fitness instructors who say “5 more push-ups!” only to say “now do 5 more after that!” (I cannot with those people.) The goal is not to be the best–it’s consistency. 

A Slump Is Only a Season, Not a Sentence

One of the bittersweet facts about life is that nothing lasts forever. We have to savor the good times and trust that the not-so-good times will pass. Periods of waiting are really, really hard. As a religious person, I find it ironic how often I can show up to church or prayer and have so little faith. Remembering that this slump is a season and not a life sentence, gives me some solace that love and goodness always come back around. I just have to hang on for the ride. 

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